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I finally figured it out

I've been house hunting for the past six months looking for the right property within my price range to the point that I didn't care if I missed out on the tax incentive. The internet has certainly made property hunting much more convenient. However, most of the pictures of properties and their descriptions are a bit misleading so I took it upon myself to translate what the agents say and what it really means. Here it goes:

Charming - Small

Cozy - Really small

Cute - Half the size of cozy

Rustic - Wood veneer panels all around and raccoons living in the crawlspace

Convenient location - Right next to the expressway

One of a kind - but not in good way

Won't last long - The house is falling apart

Make me move - Owner hates the house

Motivated seller - owner hasn't paid mortgage in a year

Handyman special - Get a tetanus shot if you want to see the property

Retains its original charm - Avocado green appliances and two tone shag carpet

Close to the water - It's on a flood plain

Secluded setting - It's out in the sticks

Fantastic view - Next door neighbor is a nudist

Move in ready - Abandoned property

Old world charm - No air conditioning

Much sought after - but failed inspections and every buyer backed out

Starter home - If we start at this property, everything else would look good

Affordable - It's in the ghetto

Updated kitchen - Repainted cabinets

Open concept - Roof leaks

Low maintenance - If you hire a maid

Unique - Ugliest house within a 50 mile radius

And much much more - this property is a piece of crap and we couldn't think of       anything good to describe it with


To be continued...
 















  • July 16 2010 - US
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Answers (1)

LMAO!! That's all pretty good and pretty true with some exceptions. Remember that a LISTING agent's job is to make the property appear attractive so Buyers will be willing to view it atlleast. Of course, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

The Buyer's age'nt will show property based on the buyer's criteria and price range, along with how much work they're willing to put into it so it shouldn't come as a surprise that if a buyer is looking for a 900 sq ft home, it's "cozy", etc.

I've shown some properties that I thought were unattractive but the buyer loved it. To each, their own.

THE END..

  • July 16 2010
  • 0Yes

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